It’s been a while since I’ve written here.  I have a “normal” blog that’s all happy and cheerful and stuff, so I’ve been posting there a bit.  But today I had to rant.

My oldest daughter is now 17.  Her boyfriend proposed at the prom, and they’ve decided to get married in 2011. Well, at first she wanted to get married in November, because it would be when they were both 19 and it would be in the fall with the trees’ colors and the cool air making it a nice for an outdoor wedding.  I was OK with that, though her father says she’s marrying this jerk over his dead body.  Well, now she’s decided the wedding will be on her 19th birthday.  I texted her and told her that was a bad idea since it screws her out of stuff for their entire marriage (not just stuff, but reasons to celebrate, etc)  and it was likely due to him just wanting less dates to remember.  She texted bad and said that it was indeed his idea and it was to make sure they didn’t fight over him forgetting their anniv.  Well hell!  If he thinks he’s going to forget the anniversary and they’re NOT EVEN MARRIED YET, then why the hell even bother with this idiot.???  If he can’t pull his head out of his ass long enough to put an alarm on his phone or mark a damn calendar, what makes her think he’ll care enough to come home at night????!?!?!?!

What kills me the most though is she actually said he cares more about her than we do.  ….  She is my first born.  My baby. I sat up holding her hand every night for months because she’d have bad dreams and was afraid to go to sleep alone.  I worried more about her spending the night at her grandma’s when I was in labor with my second – than I worried about my second being OK.  My oldest was my whole world. I’m sure my husband wasn’t happy about that, but it’s just how I was.  And now she’s 17, apparently some asshat highschool dropout jerk care more about her than i do.

Even her grandfather didn’t like him before he’d even met him just from the smirk on the kid’s face in their prom pictures.

At least she is going to NY next week.  She’ll be gone with her 13 yr old sister and her grandmother and stay with family on Long Island who have some money.  They even asked if they could spoil them.  I’m hoping the time apart from asshat boy will help her realize she can make her own decisions and not have to listen to his incessant whining.  Everytime I had her talked into this trip, the boy would whine and talk her out of going.  He’d miss her TOO MUCH. HAH!  This kept going back and forth, him undoing everything I’d done to get her to go willingly, til I told her she had no choice.  Finally her uncle in NY talked to her and convinced her to go and like it.  I’m fairly sure he bribed her. Whatever it takes.

I just wish she’d look for someone other than a  HS dropout mama’s boy.

Friend came over on Saturday to help dig up the flowers at the old place that my Mom had given me 16 years ago.  His wife and two new foster kids came with him. They sat on the steps to the place and watched as he and I dug up stuff.  I guess they wanted to get out of the house and come to the bigger town.

Saturday was also the 20th anniversary of my car accident that messed up my back and has left some memory loss issues I still deal with. My best friend at the time was also killed in that wreck.  I can’t believe it’s been 20 years.

It was also 16’s junior prom.  I helped with her hair, and a friend came over to do her makeup. She looked great, and later said she had a great time.

We’ve still not heard back from the people who wanted the trailer.  I sent the woman an email, so hopefully tomorrow we’ll find out something.  I want this to happen so bad.  I need that $140+ a month we’re paying for rent on that lot, and I want these people to be able to have it since they see the potential.

I couldn’t take it anymore, and had to come to my bedroom/office and get away from them…. My 6yr old has two friends here in the trailer park. Both little blonde girls. I think one is older and one is younger than my daughter. This is the 3rd day almost in a row that she or they have asked if they can eat something here or stay for dinner because they have no food at their house. One of the girls even said, “My grandpa knows how to make noodles, but we don’t even have any noodles.” So that day I gave them both a ham sandwich. The next day 6 told DH the girls had no food and could she take them something from our fridge. And now 6 and the girls were standing in my kitchen and all had the puppydog/orphan faces and asked if they could stay for dinner “because they have no food at their house.” I had to tell them I was sorry but no, we barely had enough for the 6 of us, and I couldn’t feed 8 people, (because if I start feeding them now, then I get the feeling I will be buying groceries for 8 people forever.)

I don’t know what to do. I’ve asked my other girls about their family, and the little girls have an older brother (who used to date 16 actually), their grandpa who they say isn’t all there in the head, and their mom who seems to never be home. My kids even said the mom was gone the other night because she’d gone to some concert. So, it sounds like she’s the stereotypical real white trash loser neglectful single whorish mother who notoriously inhabit trailer parks of the American South. So, do I start feeding her kids? Do I decide they’re lying and manipulative (probably taking after their mother)? Do I just keep turning away these little hungry faces? Do I tell child services? Don’t even tell me to confront the mother. I am NOT the confrontational type. I do however know I don’t want them to run me off to my room anymore. That bugs me. Did I mentioned I don’t get along with other people well and I don’t like other’s peoples’ kids as a rule?

UPDATE: Yeah.. I gave in and let them stay for dinner. We had spaghetti. There’s tons of it. They sound very excited. Maybe they are really hungry. I get the feeling I need to make a note of when those kids say these things and when I feed them.

Friend (Old Flame) was supposed to come over today to help dig up the flowers from the yard at the old place. My Mom gave me those flowers and I want to keep them all, but I don’t want to kill them, and I’m bad with plants.  There are irises that have managed to survive all these years at the old place but never bloomed.  I know in his flower beds, they’ll thrive and bloom.   He was one of Mom’s biggest fans – of her flower beds and cooking alike.  So, since he was coming over, it gave me more incentive to get my house cleaned up a little and get rid of some boxes that we just got used to stepping over.  Well, he didn’t come over afterall since it was too muddy from the rain last night and this morning, and he had to take his daughter to a friend’s papaw’s funeral.  So, since the house was cleaned up, I figured whynot take pics now and finally get them posted! This is my “Before” post.

Living room

Taken from front door (Sorry it's blurry)

The big old kitchen table in the dining room we carved out of the living room. That's 16 filling out a McDonalds' application.

Front wall of dining area and front door. (I can't wait til we get around to painting)

My new (to me) china cabinet. It was my housewarming gift to myself when we moved. It protects Mom's moss rose china and my stuff too.

The buffet that belonged to DH's grandparents. We rescued it from the filth of my MIL's basement. Old English works wonders!

The buffet holds my collection of serving pieces. The hanging plates were from Mom. The bookshelf holds our fav books and knickknacks.

One side of my huge new bedroom. This is my fav room

The bed. It was DH's idea to put it in diagonally. I'm glad he did, I love it. We need to center it a little better, and we're getting a bamboo plant in the corner between the Japanese prints.

My desk. It's still a mess. I tend to collect shoes under it. Still have boxes stacked in the corner. I love my new chair!

My master bathroom. I love having it right here in my master suite. YAY!

My fabulous bathtub!

Well, that’s it.  The girls’ rooms are ok, but still need a lot of work. The older girls have a HUGE room and have their beds separated, so no more bunks. They also have a chest of drawers, a tall standing guinea pig cage, and a computer desk and the brown loveseat from the old house.  My MIL has a coffee table she’s getting rid of, so she’s bringing it over tomorrow. I’m sure it’ll also need a ton of cleaning, and then we’ll put it in their room with their love seat. They can do their homework there.  I originally wanted to get like a bar height table and stools for them to sit at and do homework or play board games, cards whatever, but a free couch and coffee table work just as well.  Besides 16 likes to snuggle with her boyfriend on the couch.  If they’re here, then we can keep an eye on them at least.  Originally, the girls wanted their room to be apple green and bright pink. I got them a shaggy green carpet and pink sheer panels for their window.  However, the dog shredded the rug.  Apparently she thought it was grass?  Then they broke the blinds on their window, so we had to put up some curtains to keep the whole street from being able to see into their room.  So… for now, it’s not really decorated at all really.  Their beds are never made, there’s nothing on the walls but one Indiana Jones poster 16 got for free and a frog shaped bulleting board.  I remember when I was 12, my walls were covered in posters and pinups from Tiger Beat, and by the time I was 16, I had horse photos and paintings all over the walls, and I kept it clean and decorated.  SIGH.  I can only imagine how their own homes will look when they move out.

Now the younger girls’ room is FULL of stuff.  Their bunk beds are red and they have long blue sheer curtains. 6’s favorite color is blue and 11’s favorite color is red or dark pink, so it’s not hard to decorate their room… or wouldn’t be if they didn’t have stuff stacked up on every wall.  It’s too bad they didn’t get the bigger room, but 16 refuses to give up having a regular bed (without a bunk over her), and I don’t blame her.  When she moves out, we’ll move 12 (who will be 14+ by then to the smaller room by herself, and we’ll move 6 and 11 (who’ll be 8 and 13 ) into the bigger room.

When it stops being so darned wet outside and I can get the backporch and back yard all straightened up and looking the way I want it to, I’ll get pics of it and post them.  Hope you like the ones I put up today.

]]> http://chaospersonified.wordpress.com/2009/03/28/finally-pics-of-the-new-house/feed/ 3 Admin living-room from-front-door dining-table dining-area china-cabinet buffet buffet2 bedroom bed desk bathroom11 bathtub