I think I may have mentioned “my” Brit has a facebook page. I thought once that it was wonderful,… but now all it does it alert me over and over when he uses one of the cutesy apps to “make out with”, “cuddle”, or “get naughty with” his new girlfriend. In fact his latest Status line is “loves ****** so much words can’t do it justice.” Did I mention he hadn’t even seen this girl since he was in school until he went back home on Christmas break? And suddenly he’s so in love he can’t see straight? Can we say “desperate’? I mean, I want to be happy for him since we were best friends first and foremost. I’ve always been able to talk to him about anything. .. well until the last year or so. We’ve grown apart due to his schedule and the time zones. Anyway his new relationship is one of the things I want to be able to just deal with and get on with my life. It’s not the first. Hell he lived with another girl for 2-3 years and they just broke up and are in fact still house mates due to housing costs. When he and she got together, now THAT was heartbreak. OMG I literally thought I was going to die. So, I guess it puts this in perspective. The hurt I feel now is nothing compared to what I felt then… so I guess I’m really finally getting over him for good. Oh I will always love him dearly and passionately. But he has a right to live his own life, and I truly do want him to be happy. … I guess I just wish I didn’t have to see them playing kissy face on Facebook.
I can NOT wait til he gets back to his computer and I can talk to him on IM and see if he plans on replying to my email. last time I talked to him it was very snuggly and comfy, like the old friends that we are, reminiscing about the times we’ve had…. very much as if it was all in past tense. And I know in my heart it will likely never happen again unless we meet again when we’re in our 50s or 60s .. but it will still be different then. I know it’s all over. But with this relationship, I can’t just break it off clean and wish him well.. he is my youngest daughter’s godfather and is still my best friend.
I MISS YOU AND LOVE YOU FOREVER MY SEXY BRIT!!!!
Just needed to get all of that off my chest. I feel better now.
